Be The Axolotl
#emotionalwounds #selfhealing #believeinyourself
Preface & Author’s Note: The impetus and motivation for what follows was initiated by a desire to reach out and hopefully provide comfort for a very dear friend who was going through some life altering situations which had foundation-shaking impacts. I am sometimes prone to over-emphasis, but not in this case. As I was perusing the ether of the Internet, looking for ideas of what I felt I should share from my heart, I stumbled upon the Axolotl. Are you familiar with the Axolotl? No, don’t worry, most folks aren’t, and I certainly wasn’t. But read on, and I beg, that you stick it out with my overly loquacious delivery to get to my final points.
Background: My friend, who shall remain nameless – and to the best of my ability, shrouded in secrecy – is going through some life-altering circumstances that have an ongoing adverse impact to their psyche, stress level and self-confidence. This is not unusual, nor is it a set of circumstances, where the cause of such can solely be laid easily at their feet. As is also common in these situations, my friend has wound up being emotionally pummeled and wounded, facing uncertainty and self-doubt, and under continual stress.
The started me thinking about the wounds that we all suffer that are internal. As some refer to them, ‘the hidden wounds’, although in my experience they do surface for others to see – sometimes rarely, sometimes more frequently and with a fair amount of concealment and camouflage. We all have them in varying levels of severity and from a spectrum of causes. Small ones that leave our emotions with tiny bruises to scars that crisscross our psyche to full on sucking chest wounds (emotionally speaking) that are the fertile fields where nightmares grow and that affect almost every aspect of how we deal with others.
But it struck me that, much like wounds to our physical bodies, severe emotional wounds also result in the damage – and sometimes the loss – of a ‘body part’. An amputation of our ability to feel joy at a memory, a ‘ghost pain’ when something is said or done that triggers our emotional response, and the loss of a part of who we once were.
As I like to use analogies and examples (because my excessive use of words still cannot completely convey what I want to say sometimes), my thoughts ran towards physical body analogies for thoughts on how to deal with these emotional wounds. I remembered that skinks (again, for those who are not sponge-traps for trivia nor students of zoology, skinks are a part of the lizard families of reptiles) are able to actually detach their tails to escape predators and then regrow them. But the use of the word ‘skink’ and talking about regrowing tails in this circumstance just did not seem to have the right gravitas that I was looking for. So, I continued my digital meanderings, seeking what I believed had to out there in nature. And, lo and behold, enter stage left, the amazing Axolotl!
Unlike other examples of animals that can regrow body parts (everything from the annual regrowth of a male deer’s antlers to the aforementioned skink magical tail disappear/reappearing trick), axolotls are able to regenerate not just their limbs, but also such ‘mission critical’ body parts as eyes, heart, spinal cord, and parts of its brain. And dig this: axolotls retain this regenerative capability during its entire lifespan. But enough about aquatic salamanders (one of which is the supernatural axolotl), how is this applicable.
Because when we are wounded, physically or emotionally, we need to heal. We need to find that path that allows us to keep on living – and seeking joy in life. I’m not being cavalier about this, it is incredibly difficult, and for some of us, a mountain too tall to scale with the results being worse than the original wound. But how do we find that path? How do we encourage ourselves to face the slog, day after day? It’s brutal. But we need to find the strength and the courage to do so. And that journey begins with the belief and confidence that it is possible. That we can envision healing taking place.
So here’s the point - be a FUCKING AXOLOTL!!!! I usually try not to resort to cheap cursing to make a point, but I think it resonates (at least for me) here. I believe - at the core of my being - that each of us are stronger, more resilient and have greater internal resources than we are aware. So, choose - I mean PURPOSEFULLY choose to be an AXOLOTL! You cannot avoid being wounded, from being hurt, from being tired. But reach down into your chi, to that part that is sacred to you and to you alone. That part of you that belongs to no one else but you - and no one but you can control it, rely on it and employ it. Use it to regenerate. Use it to regrow. Use it to restrengthen yourself.
If you remember the previous part where I went into professorial mode and told you what the axolotl is capable of doing - regeneration of not only superficial portions of its body, but key and critical systems for its life - take this to your heart and know that you too can regenerate and heal your wounds. While we all ‘need’ someone in our lives (and this missive is not intended to take away the need for family, friends and counselors), the truth is that first and foremost, we need ourselves. We must have the confidence in ourselves that we can rise above what life, nature, and yes - even God - throws at us. It is our gift, our promise and the essence of how we were created in God’s image that we can persevere. So please, be an axolotl because you were created to have that strength and that capability. Don’t trust in my saying this - believe in yourself and you will come through this storm-laden journey stronger and more confident than you stumbled into it.
Enough of my preaching, as I get redundant the more that I pound on the pulpit. I know that I have quite possibly and yet once again, crossed a boundary for some of you. But know that I sincerely pray for each of us to find our individual path and gain peace with where your journey takes you, regardless of where it heads.
Just be the axolotl… Please.
